Imagine reading a book of every conversation where people have spoken about you.
maybe i should do my homework
let’s consult david tennant
david tennant has spoken
you guys i opened a door to let the dogs out and a fucking spider ran across my foot inside and then i was screaming and my mom dropped a plastic bowl on it to not let it run away and then it fUCKING GAVE BIRTH ON THE FLOOR IN THE BOWL AND THEN WE WERE BOTH SCREAMING
WHAT DO I DO
ITS STILL IN THE BOWL AND ITS JUST HAVING MORE BABIES
IT DROPPED MORE BABIES
MY DADS LIKE GASSING THEM WITH SPRAY AND ITS STILL GIVING BIRTH
YOU GUYS THOSE ARE ALL BABIES
FUCK MY LIFE
There is only one solution:
i dont understand this show
So my driving instructor texted me, and I was walking so I just typed ‘Ok’ and hit send and then I looked at it and was like WHAT
But as it turns out, my friends are entirely responsible for turning ‘Ok’ into a shortcut.
That is so cool. It’s the sound waves of them saying I do. Holy crap.
just gonna reblog this every single time i see it
when i get married i wan
You’re bad at grammar? *pats u on shoulder* their, they’re, there.
sometimes when i drop something i’ll just stand there and groan until someone picks it up for me
I THREW A GRAPE IN THE AIR TO CATCH IT IN MY MOUTH BUT IT WENT TOO HIGH AND HIT THE CEILING AND THERE WAS A SPIDER THERE AND THE SPIDER FELL AND SO DID THE GRAPE AND THEY BOTH LANDED ON MY FACE AND I STILL HAVEN’T STOPPED SCREAMING
quick have sex with me i’ll explain later
me and dale
god i hope my history teacher doesnt get extremely offended by this
we have to adapt a story to be about something weve been studying and read it to the class
my group is doing the very hungry hitler
OH MY GOD
so hitler took poland
but he was still hungry